..A World of Nonsense..

total and complete failure this year.

and it's all because of me, truthfully.

But there's nothing I can do any more, except keep showing my face.

Adi added to the nonsense at 3:34 AM

why
are the japanese so good at writing music in the modern era?

Adi added to the nonsense at 2:53 AM

who am I to say anything any more.

with such a family.

you can't hope to match others if your own team isn't united.

and my family is anything but.

my dad got a trophy for being best bowler in a cricket match.

and my mum spends half an hour crapping about how hard it is to make us do anything.

i think i'll start living in the corner with my mouth wide shut from now on. wide shut.

Adi added to the nonsense at 8:19 AM

that crazed feeling.

staring through bloodshot exahausted eyes, at something that will never happen no matter how badly you want it to.

appearing to have frozen in time.

and the clock ticks.

and the situation keeps hitting you.

and you keep chiding yourself.

keep feeling ashamed inside.

and you couldn't find anything useful to do for the last 3 hours.

but you keep trying.

still keep staring.

hypnotized.

the intermittent pain you felt.

the discomfort.

the agony.

the disappointment.

the typhoons of emotional battle.

the passing.

the calm.

and the re-start.

with dimrain47's the kriotube playing in the background.

and then the spell is broken.

time seems to move again.

in a frenzy.

but is my purpose still at a standstill?

is my realisticness anywhere at all?

Adi added to the nonsense at 6:53 AM

and then I asked myself;

is that what I really care about?

Adi added to the nonsense at 6:46 AM

http://www.newgrounds.com/audio/listen/214357

DJ sc00p.

feel the power surging from 0:48 to 1:21

and crank up the volume for a REAL experience of what music can do.

Adi added to the nonsense at 6:18 AM

worrying times for ACS; worrying times for me.
5 consecutive lost finals. in two days.

but ACS will stay strong as always. The Best Is Yet To Be.

on another note.

everything's always my fault, eh.

and all I do is always made irrelevantly futile. with consequences.

Adi added to the nonsense at 6:00 AM

another shot in the foot.

and the envy and regret will still remain.

Adi added to the nonsense at 6:52 AM

Adi added to the nonsense at 4:37 AM

not againnnnnnnnnnnn.

and I know what I want, I know what I need.

but of course, what that is, will never be meant for me.

even the best fall down sometimes. what would happen if i shockingly neglected both these essays huh? begin full of resolve to do and finish them tonight.

and now, end up feeling like the loser again, after a usual day of school. i'm not going to do them, i'm going to face the consequences. even a prefect needs some support once in a while.

the usual. made to feel as though i don't know anything, as though i'm not supposed to be where i am.

i guess it's almost true.

and i don't need people to tag telling me things I should do. if you're good enough to tell me things like everyone thinks they are, then do something, instead of giving lip service.

Adi added to the nonsense at 4:35 AM